[Length: around 500 words. Content: a glorified book review]
Everything starts with a name. I recall wondering when I started off this blog - what was my purpose? What did I want to say?
The conceit I arrived at was simple - I'm exploring the world. I live in cities. I'm a programmer. What’s a hybrid of all these things? An Urban REPL - that is, Read-Evaluate-Print-Loop.
Do a thing. Think about what I learned from doing that thing. Write about doing that thing. Repeat.
That's the conceit of Urban REPL: Do more things, and share the good news of all the things that I found.
As I find myself in a transitory phase, I wonder. Did I get it all wrong? Was the conceit doomed from the start because it was asking the wrong question?
This year, I've been taking things a little bit more slowly. I've been reading more. Two books form the outline of an in idea my mind - How To Be Bored by Eva Hoffman, and The Agony and the Ecstasy, a biographical novel of Michaelangelo.
Expressed most simply, the idea is this - are we all, in the modern west, trying to do too much? Have I been following all the most corrupt, all the most flawed, philosophies and habits of the society in which I find myself? This idea is captured in the simple acronym - FOMO. Why do so many of us feel like we're missing out on something important each day?
I don't know the answer to this myself, but I do wonder.
Eva proscribes for all of us to take an active intention into our leisurely pursuits. That is, we should intentionally take time to reflect on our values, to engage with nature, or to have simple time in which we think about almost nothing at all. From these acts we gain a deeper understanding of our own needs and values, which we can then use to better guide the decisions we make in our day to day life.
The story of Michaelangelo, for me, helped me better realize my own nature, helped me better accept that this kind of intentional leisure could help me make better decisions. In the story, there are parts where he is jealous of Raphael, of da Vinci, and their devoted followers - as he lives in a decrepit apartment, working 20 hours a day. Despite this, did he not create miraculous works of art that we still enjoy today? Despite this, was he not satisfied with his accomplishments when he had a chance to look over them on his deathbed? In my own case, if I know that I’m doing good work...if I’m doing work that adds to the world, that needs to be done...then I can take some solace in that. Could I do more? Perhaps. But also, perhaps not.
When I combine the lessons from these two books, I come to a simple conclusion: know thyself. Sometimes, for however complex the process it takes to get there - some 800 pages of novel and philosophy - all that matters is that you get there.